Stand to show respect

 

Picture this

I go to drop my 4 year old daughter to school everyday. In her school, I have to cross 4 other Classes before i reach her class of nursery. This particular day we were late. I told Diaa that today you will miss out on the National Anthem, for sure. As we neared the first class, we could hear the faint sound of the anthem being sung. It became more clear at the next two steps and immediately Diaa told me, “Mumma wait. They are singing the National Anthem. We have to stand.” I told her, “you are late for your class. Lets go, you can sing it with your classmates.” She just gestured me with a finger on her lips with one hand and the fingers of the other hand spread out asking me to stand still. We stood there waiting for it to finish. Actually, i was waiting for it to finish, glancing at my watch every 10 seconds. She was singing along, in no hurry. I noticed one teacher and two more mothers standing with us. They must also be passing the corridor and then stood still when they heard the students singing it. It lasted for only a minute and i immediately grabbed her hand to take her to her own class. As we neared the second class, we could again hear a faint sound. The moment we were in front of that class door, i realised that its now this class which is starting to sing The Anthem. We both exchanged one glance and i knew that she wants to wait here also untill they have finished. She told me, “Now this class is also singing. We must stand here also.” I obliged. This time i was also singing along with her. I also happened to notice the students. They were all singing along with the teachers in attention pose. There were a few fumbles in the pronunciation of a few words but most of them could sing without missing out on a word completely. Only a few children, maybe two or three, standing behind, away from the eagle eyes of the teacher, were staring out the door or fidgetting with something in their hand but their lips were in total sync with the rest of the class. Here also, it took us just about a minute to finish the anthem and we again started our journey to her own class. I was already prepared to wait at another class and my walking-as-if-i-am-running steps had slowed down but at the third class, they were just about to finish singing it. It ended as soon as we reached there. Diaa looked at me with a smile and said,”its over here. Come fast, i am late.” At the fourth class, the children had all settled down and were removing books from their bags as per the teachers instructions. Diaa again told me, “mumma jaldi chalo.”

Finally we reached her own class. Her teacher looked at her and exclaimed, “Diaa!! Good morning!! You are a little late!! We just finished singing the National Anthem!! You missed it dear!!”

I looked at her, we both smiled and i thought to myself, did she miss it?? Really?? Naaahh!! Infact, she sang it twice that day!!

On my way out of the school, i was recalling the entire 5-7 minutes journey that i underwent with my daughter. I was amused and smiling to myself when i recalled her image of how she asked me to stand still and quiet just using the gestures of her tiny hands. As i exited the school, two things crossed my mind. The first one was about the supreme court ruling making it mandatory for all movie theatres to play the National Anthem before the screening of every movie show and a few guidelines that came along with it. They say that it will instill a sense of patriotism in the hearts of the citizens. My experience today somehow strengthened my belief that it may prove to be helpful. Sometimes, when we do somethings repeatedly, the action and reaction to it becomes our nature. Like for example, the moment i see a temple while travelling on the roads, i instantly bow my head low, close my eyes and say a silent prayer. And i have seen many people do that because its been instilled in our minds that you need to pay respect to God anywhere you see Him. I think a similar reaction can be expected if people are made to stand in the theatres for the National Anthem. But i also feel that just this much is not enough considering the fact that not all of india goes to watch movies. We need to encourage it since childhood if we really want them to undersand that the National Anthem deserves respect wherever it is played, even if noone is watching us. So, in my opinion, making it compulsory in all schools, colleges and other educational institutions may be a better option to help achieve the desired result.

The second one was about the other three people who were standing with us at the first class. What must have made them stand?? Was it really out of respect or was it because they saw us standing and thought they should stand too or they will be seen as disrespectful or unpatriotic. Would they have stood if Diaa and me were not standing there already?? Maybe yes, maybe no. Like how it happens at a traffic signal. One motorist jumps a red light and many others follow him. Similarly, on a deserted traffic signal where everyone is violating the red light, sometimes there is this one car,bike or activa( like me ) which stops behind the line, irrespective of there being a traffic policeman or not, irrespective of the scorching heat troubling my little one and making those 110 seconds seem never ending and looking at us many others follow suit. What happened in school today could be an extension of this syndrome. Diaa made me stand in respect for the National Anthem and looking at us, three others thought of doing the same. If the supreme court ruling changes the attitude of even a handful of citizens, its quite possible that their patriotism will rub on others when put in a similar situation.

All in all, i think the supreme court is only trying to make us more expressive about our love for our country. The ruling can cause no harm, we have nothing to lose by following it even if we dont stand to gain much.

P.S. In the movie Dangal, the National Anthem is played towards the end of the movie when Geeta Phogat wins her first international gold medal and i saw everyone in the theatre stand up for it. As far as i remember, there was no instruction on the screen to do so but the scene was executed so powerfully that it invokes a sense of pride for the Tricolor and makes you want to stand in respect for it.

Let it flow when you have to

Picture this:

It’s 2:15pm. I went to pick up my 4year old daughter from school.  She was playing with her favourite hand puppets and was happy to see me. On our walk back, she playfully asked me to carry her to the activa. A menstrual back ache made me say no to her.  She requested, I denied, she insisted, I denied, she demanded, I denied. We reached the activa and it was all forgotten. The ride back was full of talks about what happened in school, whether tiffin is finished or not and the usual. In the evening, at about 6:30pm, she again remembered that she had asked me to carry her and I had refused and wanted to be carried now. I told her I will make her sit in my lap while she eats her soup but she wanted to be carried around the house and not sit in my lap. What concluded happily in the afternoon turned in to a tantrum in the evening. She was crying, howling and screaming in my ears sitting in my lap. After some time, I lost it. I screamed back at her. She just gave me a silent gaze startled by the sudden rise in my voice and again started crying. But this time, she was crying out of hurt. I could feel it in her voice. The same girl crying a few seconds ago was getting on my nerves and now the crying of the same girl was melting away my heart. I was angry with myself for not obliging such a small request by her. She only wanted to be loved and I couldn’t fulfill that.  The guilt had set in. I immediately took her in my arms and started carrying her around. All the pain and the cramps were forgotten.  She rested her head on my shoulders and hugged me tightly. The warmth in that hug said so much to me. I was shedding silent tears by now, Happy that she was not crying and guilty that I hurt her. She heard me cry and lifted her head up to confirm if she was right. She saw me crying and started crying again. This time, we were united in our sorrow. She was crying for me, I was crying for her. We both wiped each other’s cheeks and made peace. I gave her a set of crayons and a book to draw and colour. Now she went about doing her business and  I did mine.

All this happened in duration of merely 15-20 minutes. So many emoitons were experienced and so much was said silently but the one thing that was common in this emotional roller coaster was tears. We were both shedding tears. Tantrum tears, hurt tears, anger tears, guilt tears, I-love-you-you-love-me tears, lets-end-this-tears.

Tears have a sweet and salty relationship with the human heart. It is no surprise that nature has chosen this emotion to express our arrival in this beautiful world. A child’s cry is the first sound that falls on mother’s ears.  In fact the crying signifies that all is well and if the baby doesn’t cry then he/she is made to cry. From here begins a journey between the heart and eyes, connected by the watery gland. You feel happy, tears well up your eyes. You feel sad, tears moist your cheeks.  You feel victorious, accepted and successful or you feel defeated, rejected and unsuccessful, tears just show up without taking our permission. Just goes to show that they have a very strong mind of their own and will just arrive unannounced.  Even the LOL emoticon is shown having tears!!

In spite of having such a strong connection with all human emotions possible, tears or rather crying is considered a sign of weakness.  A person with a very active set of tear glands is always an easy target. But I feel otherwise.  I feel tears bind us very strongly. There’s a saying,” a family that prays together stays together.” I say,” a family that can cry together in its sorrow stays together.” What happened between my daughter and me was not the first time. It has happened before and ditto between my son and me. After each incident, we just realised that we love each other way too much to cause any amount of pain to each other. Somewhere it gave a message that your pain is my pain, your sorrow is my sorrow, and we have each other to share the downs as much as enjoy the ups. I don’t know if they understand this now but when they grow up, they will remember me as a human who had shortcomings and who also needed a shoulder to cry on just like they do. And also, I will be there for them should they need to lean on me and wet my lap.

Another aspect about crying which I like is that it really helps to vent out. Sometimes, things and situations are not in our control. They don’t go the way we want them to. It results in frustration, anger, helplessness getting built up inside. As much as you want to fight it and find a solution, you are just not able to see it right. But after you have cried your heart out, the fog seems to clear. You can see things in the correct perspective and work things out without losing your cool.

So, next time you feel like crying, don’t hold back, just let the tears flow when you have to and release the pressure.

You, from my eyes….

Hey friends!! This is my first attempt at writing fiction!! Please read it and give your valuable feedback!! I hope you like it!! Here it goes……

You, From my eyes…..

She is awfully quiet today. I can feel it. I am not near her but i know that she is deeply hurt inside. She needs someone to lean on, to talk to. I wish i could run to her but no i cant. I have caused her enough hurt. Oh god! Bring her to me so that i can ease off some of her pain.

She just woke up and left. Didnt even look at me. As if i am not there at all. We always left home together, arm in arm. How did we change so much? Where did our relationship go wrong?? We talked about everything under the sun, but now she doesnt need me anymore. Actually she needs me but has somehow forgotten that i was, i am and i will always be there for her. Ohh!! If only i was not buried under these books!!!

Its raining today!! Rains always remind her of me. I am sure when she comes home today she will miss me…

I was right. She finally came upto me. I told you that she loves me. Its just that she was too occupied in her own sorrow to be able to share it with me. The same sorrows that had seperated us, have brought us together again. We are looking at each other. We are holding each other. I can see her moist cheeks, smudged kajal and i know that she wants to pour her heart out to me. I opened my arms wide and took her every sorrow, all the hurt and pain in my embrace. Her tears didnt just wet me but my soul too. She just couldnt stop crying but i am glad she realised that i do love her. I missed her too. I was waiting for her to open up to me. I couldnt force her untill she wanted to. Now that she has shared everything with me, it will make her feel good. I am happy for her. She is sleeping soundly today, like a baby. The calm on her face after the turmoil is very reassuring. We are a couple again.

Its morning and just the way i like it to be. We had breakfast together and she spilled her coffee as usual. But this time it was on me instead of the floor. Its just a small spill. She didnt notice it otherwise would have reached for a tissue. We left for work together, arm in arm. The walk upto the bus stop was usual. She had a spring in her step. I know she is giving life a second chance. A break up is not the end of the world. Its tough to get over it but she has always been strong. I have been with her since her first crush. I know she’s been through this before and will emerge a winner again. We wont see each other till evening now. I cant wait to get home to see her.

She is seeing someone!! i havent seen her so excited about a date since so many months. Its good to see her fussing about her clothes, her hair, shoes and all that. Going by the effort she is putting in to look her best, i know she is seriuos about him. I hope she finds her soulmate in him this time. She has gone through enough heart breaks. Now i wish she has a ” and they lived happilly everafter” story with him. She has told me about him. He seems like a nice man. As much in love with her as she with him. I will meet him today for the first time.

He was late to pick her for their date. So i couldnt be introduced formally. I had a glimpse of him before she shut the door behind her. He is very handsome. They look lovely together. They walked upto the car hand in hand. I hope he opens the door for her. She likes chivalrous men, those who treat a lady with love and respect.

I think i will go to sleep. She will be late. I hope they have a good time. I am happy for her but somewhere i know she will see me less now. She will talk to me but it will be interrupted by his messages, phone calls and video chats. I will still be happy. She has found someone to share her life with and wont need a lifeless diary to speak to every night. I have been with her since she started understanding her feelings, sometimes being the mom she misses so much, sometimes the man she yearns for and sometimes the friend seven seas away but i am, after all, just a bunch of blank pages waiting to be inked with her life experiences.

An unwed father

I grab the newspaper after my morning walk every day. I like to read the parenting and health related pages. Suddenly a big headline grabs my attention. Tusshar Kapoor becomes a dad. The first thing that crosses my mind is when did he marry?? And why was it nowhere in the papers?? Did he hide it so that it doesn’t affect his fan following? You know, its normal for actors to do that. And then I went on to read the content. His son is born through surrogacy….. I got confused, and after a moment or two, I realised that he is an unwed father and the baby was not thrust on him just because he used his sperm to conceive it but it was a well thought decision, taken after lot of soul searching and counselling by expert doctors!!!  Woooow!! That is awesome!!! I felt so ashamed of myself for judging the book before actually reading it. This man here had the guts to follow his parental instincts and he has gone ahead and done something which is such a big taboo here in India. And I am sitting here comfortably and ripping apart his life as if it is any of my business. Shame on you Neha Kedia…..

Single male parent is generally synonymous with a man who has either separated from his wife or whose wife has died. Surrogacy is an option for those COUPLES who are not able to conceive naturally. Tusshar Kapoor is neither married nor an infertile couple. He is still a single parent.  He became a father after deciding to bring his child in the world, and care for him single handedly without marrying. Science helped him and with IVF and surrogacy his wish was fulfilled. I know many couples who are struggling with their kids. I, myself feel burdened by it so many days. And Tusshar has taken the plunge out of his own choice, his own will and desire to raise a life and dedicate himself in his upbringing without a woman to share this responsibility. That is, for me, very respectable and worth a salute. It’s really commendable that he doesn’t think that marriage is the first step for making babies or that you need to love a woman first to be able to become a father. It’s the dawn of a new era. Being a celebrity, this step by him will open the doors for so many other men who secretly wish to father a child but are not able to do so because they haven’t been lucky enough to fall in love with the right women or simply because they are not courageous enough like Tusshar. He has joined the gang of super dads who are not afraid of the responsibility and wear their dad badge proudly.  It made my heart melt when he said that he doesn’t want to talk much about the baby, forget about sharing a picture because, “nazar lag jati hai!!” Awwww!! That’s so sweet!!! He also mentioned that he is learning how to burp the child after his feed sessions. I suddenly find him very attractive and hot!! A man with such a soft heart is bound to be irresistible!!

And as for the little gentleman, Laksshya Tusshar Kapoor (notice the double s in their names?? That’s courtesy Ekta Kapoor; she is the numerology connection in this family), he is not even aware of how influential his birth is going to be. He is already made it to the record books and is etched in history.  His name will always generate remarks about his father and how he bent the rules to have him. I am sure Tusshar must have given this a good thought because the road ahead is bouncy and bumpy. A lot of questions posed by the prodigy will have to be dealt with very sensitively. I am wondering how he is going to answer his queries about his mother. The female donor’s name is not disclosed as per medical guidelines. The child has the genes of one women and he has been nurtured in the womb of another women. He is definitely going to be curious about who his mother is, how did she look, why is there no picture of her in the house, why this, why that. I hope, in fact I am sure he will handle him very well. I hope he tells the child (when he is old enough to understand) that his mother did not sell him but it was an arrangement made between them because he was ready to be a father but not a husband. He was prepared to stay up all night, feed him, change his diapers and rock him to sleep but he was not prepared to share him with his mother. He thought that he will be both father and mother to him. He could have adopted but the laws are stringent and he wanted a child with his own flesh and blood, his genes, his traits. I hope his school allows Tusshar to attend mother’s day events and he can be enrolled in mother- toddler classes with his father.

Think of this. A thought so genuine, so pure, which stems from a simple wish of nurturing a life, and watching him bloom and flourish, with its roots firmly holding the soil of love and some people call it illegal. According to a senior doctor, as per RULES, this shouldn’t have happened. The rules are in place but the legislation is not passed. Thank god!!! In the words of another senior doctor,” no laws broken as none exist.”

All the best to this unique father-son duo, may you experience the highs and lows of life together.  May your relationship blossom each day. May you always be there for each other. Amen.

Decluttering the mind attic (part 3)

I don’t know why but I can’t seem to get over with this topic. Somehow, there is something new I am discovering about clearing our thoughts and I am just propelled to write more about it. I started with Decluttering my moms attic but I am ending up thinking about how much Decluttering have I actually undertaken.

I have always been an organized person. My cupboards, my books, my room have always been very neat and tidy. I try to instill the same trait in my kids. “If you take anything from any drawers in the house, put it back there after you are done. Next time when you need it you will automatically find it there. No need for you to go fishing and hunting and no need for me to help you find it”. I say this to my kids almost everyday. It’s become so routine that I see Pratham roll his eyes when I am about to start the sentence.

But I never realised that I need to sort out my thoughts too. Just as I make sure that my house is clutter free, it is equally important to declutter my mind. When i do away with things that have been in my home attics, i close that chapter from my life. It’s like, ” out of sight is out of mind” but the same is not true for the mind attic. Here we clutter ourselves with so much hate and negativity that we don’t find it easy to let go, to forgive and forget. We keep coming back to those memories which have caused us hurt, pain and inexpressible grief. And in the end, it results in sour relationships, bitter communication and wet pillows. Also, hair fall, dark circles and lost peace of mind.

The things in the attic keeping popping out now and then, screaming for our attention and somehow give us hints that now you have to move us out. The jammed doors that won’t close tell you that it’s time to declutter. Our mind does the same. It too give us hints that the negativity is eating up too much space, it’s getting cramped in here, making it impossible for the sunlight of positivity and fresh air of happiness to spread. The goodness, the peace are getting suffocated. But we don’t recognize these hints, either out of ignorance or to avoid confrontations. And when we do realise, lot of precious time is lost, youth is spent, desires are drained, wishes are washed away.

A weighing scale helps me to keep a check on how much weight I am losing or gaining. But what about the weight I am carrying on my mind?? I never thought that there is no scale to measure this and if I don’t lose this soon, it will just go on piling and that’s very hazardous for anyone’s mental health. I have to depend on the signals that my mind gives me to start working on clearing my mind space.

The trip down memory lane, the vacation with my family, the conflict between a daughter and a daughter in law, the sadness of being separated from parents, the happiness of being back to my own home, everything was creating such a ruckus in my mind, my soul that it was getting difficult to understand what is it that I really want. What will make me happy eventually. I am still working on it but now I know that you don’t have to choose between your past and future. You can hope for better things in future while embracing the past and forgiving all those who hurt you intentionally or unintentionally. Piling up on past hatred does no good, neither does spitting venom on the person who caused hurt to you. It just escalates the problem from bad to worse. One thing leads to another. Digging up old graves will reveal only skeletons of the past. Instead sow the seeds of forgiveness, nurture them with unconditional love and care and very soon bright flowers of hope, peace and happiness in vibrant hues will start blossoming. It’s not easy doing this but instead of directing our energy to remember what was just plain painful and becoming a sob-a-holic, isn’t it sensible to divert our energy into forgetting it and emerging a winner??

The past will return to haunt you. It will suck out every drop of positivity from you. But it depends on us, how determined we are to scare away the ghosts and make way for the Angels. I am making a promise to myself today, that my future, my happiness, my goodness will not be shaped at the hands of past criticism and hatred. Whenever it will raise its heads, I will calmly tell myself, ” it’s ok Neha, this is all behind you. It is all over. It’s never going to return. What you see now are just ghosts from the past, don’t let them spoil your present or future. They are thrown at you so that they get a reaction and become alive but it’s upto you to keep them buried and show them that they hold no importance in your life and they are not welcome in your mind attic. It’s a happy place for happy memories and you have angels guarding it against them.

Now that I have understood this and I have recognized the hints which were thrown at me from time to time, I am looking at improving my mental health. I have read about the benefits of meditation and I think it’s time to try it.

To all of you out there, feeling unhappy, confused, frustrated about where is life taking you, which direction you are headed to, take some time out for yourself. Be one with yourself if only for a few minutes everyday. Just close your eyes and listen to the beautiful rhythm created by your breathing and Heart beats. And if possible, go on a holiday, at least once in two years. It will definitely clear the fog and you will see the sun shining brightly.

Decluttering the mind attic (part 2)

 

I always make space in my wardrobes when I come to visit my parents in summers. I do away with the old stuff so that I don’t waste time in creating space for the new stuff and can just unpack my bags. I don’t do this to save time and avoid fussing over not having enough space in the cupboards. But I do this to give time to myself to settle back emotionally. More than unpacking my suitcases, it’s the emotional baggage which is difficult to unpack. In other words, I come back with lot of things packed in my mind attic and for the first one or two days, I need to direct all my energy in sorting out these things than to think about anything else. The day to day routines which are centered around my maiden family, the aroma of the food cooked by my mom, the familiarity and comfort of the quilts and pillows which have been a partner in many dreams, the fact that my parents are just a shout away, the sense of belonging that comes from the city where I have spent the best days of my childhood, the waves of memories that flood my mind when I pass a friend’s house, all of this awaken so many sleeping cells in my mind. And when I am back, I need to put them away in a corner again. There is a conflict going on. One half of my heart longs to be with them more and the other half loves being back to my home. On one hand I feel the need to be alone with myself but the daily chores, the routine pull me back to the everyday grind. I have to explain, argue, convince myself that this is how life is for a girl after marriage. I have to be content that I at least get to visit my parents every year. There are so many friends who are living in different continents and depend on skype, whatsapp or other such similar technology to keep in touch. Even after 13 years of marriage, whenever I am saying good bye to my parents, it is extremely painful. I wish I never had to do this. I wish to be with them a little longer. The first one or two days, I need all the energy to sort out the memories which I have gathered in my mind, to strain out every positive vibe from all those memories to last me a year, till I can go back to them and refuel myself with what gets drained drop by drop.

This year the transition from being a daughter to a daughter-in-law was much easier because my hubby took us for an exotic holiday to Singapore. So, as soon as I came back from my parents house, he flew all four of us away and the excitement, happiness and twinkle in my kid’s eyes about traveling in an aeroplane kept me away from the sadness of saying bye to my parents. It was an absolutely marvelous way of unwinding and Decluttering the mind attic. We had not taken a vacation in a long time and that made this all the more enjoyable. It was also a digital detox of sorts since we didn’t have international roaming on our phones and would connect to the hotel wifi only during the night. No tabs, no laptops, no tv, no mobile. Just us. The four of us.
I noticed that my son has started reaching my shoulders, I noticed that he is very helpful and responsible. I noticed that he is extremely caring and possessive about his sister. He may get totally annoyed by her irritating antics but he gets worried about her if she is not in sight for even a second. I noticed that he doesn’t mind hugging me in public and I can still kiss him without him feeling embarrassed. I noticed that my daughter gets jealous when I do that. I noticed that my daughter is a total attention seeker. My husband has started greying. I like his salt and pepper look. I noticed that I still like to rest my head on my hubby’s shoulder. I still love to hold his hand and he still gives me a tight squeeze when I do that.

I realised that as painful as it is for me to separate from my parents, I am equally in love with my family. And just as a bird pushes it’s offsprings out of the nest, so that they may begin their journey of life independently, my parents have also set me free to build my own nest, to start my own family. And inspite of them being far away they will always be close to me. When I called them up from Singapore( thanks to free whatsapp calling), I could feel it in their voice that they are happy for me and this is how it’s going to be. And the distance doesn’t matter, really.

Everyone should go for a vacation. Where, doesn’t matter actually. What is important is spending time with each other without gadgets surrounding you. It helps put a lot of things in perspective. It definitely helps in Decluttering the mind, organizing all your thoughts and segregating the positives from the negatives.

Decluttering the mind attic (part 1)

 

My mom had told me that she wants to declutter her attic with my help when I am visiting her this summer. My mom’s attic is one of my favourite places in my maiden home. All the articles kept there are a reflection of some incident of her life. It’s as if her entire 40 years of marriage is locked up in there and since my childhood is also attached to it, I too find something that gives me a chance to reflect on my past. Each time she opens some loft and removes an article carefully wrapped in layers of newspaper or polythene, it opens the doors to the other attic, that part of her brain, where she keeps her memories. Decluttering the attic is one of the toughest jobs on earth. Trips to the attic are always a splurge of emotions. It was on one such trip that she found my old toys and took me for a ride back in time.

Last rakshabandhan, my sisters, together with me, decided to give a surprise to my brothers and bhabhis. We thought of preparing a slideshow of pictures from our childhood. Another reason to visit the attic of the home and the mind. So all three of us got busy digging up old albums, and I can’t put in words the euphoria all of us felt while going through the pictures. I am so glad that I was assigned the easier job of sending all the pics to my sister and she took up the difficult job of deciding what goes in the slide show and what not. For me, each picture was worthy of a well deserved place in the final show. Each picture had a story behind it, maybe the dress worn by us, the place where it was clicked, the occasion, the tear rolling down the cheek or the smile spreading from one ear to another.

Every thing that is stored at the deepest, darkest corner of the home attic is capable of lighting up the darkest corner of the mind attic. A pickle jar that still smells of the pickle that my grandma used to make, some cameras which helped freeze each frame of our life, some sarees of my mom which were spun with the thread of love, sofa covers and table mats that have adorned her drawing room furniture for umpteen kitty parties and family get togethers, a radio which kept her company while she cooked delicious meals for us, embroidery and crochet threads, needles and books that have helped weave emotions and feelings in her bed sheets and design masterpieces one after another.

Each time I mentioned doing away with it because she is not using them anymore and it’s using unnecessary space, my mom clinged on to it more tightly. Perhaps, maybe because it meant doing away with the memory associated with it. Somehow feeling those articles in her hand and touching them, gave her flashes of incidents related to them, some bitter, some sweet, some tugging at the strings of her heart and still urging to be set free.

“Let us go, it’s time to move on. You have looked after us well, wiped us, dusted us, treasured us, cared for us, now let us go. Make space for new articles which will make new memories for you. As it is, we have a permanent place in your mind attic, no one will object the amount of space we are using there, in the attic called the heart of the mind. It’s time to part ways so that we can make new memories with our new owners or breathe our last in the corner of a dumpyard with other obsolete articles. Let us be one with the many of our kind where we can talk about our experiences with each other, how we touched the lives of our owners, shared a life with them and how enriching it was for both of us.”

My mom has somehow understood the importance of giving away. She has mustered the courage to take the first step. She has decided to declutter the attic- of her home and mind, let’s wait and watch how far she is able to go.